By Nick Seuberling
Seubs@pigskinpodcast.com
If you've ever seen the movie "Dumb and Dumber," there's a scene when Lloyd, played by Jim Carrey, gets in a fight with Harry, played by Jeff Daniels. In a quest destined for Aspen, Colo., Lloyd drives the wrong way, instead ending up in Nebraska.
In anger and frustration, Harry decides to walk away from their Sheep Dog van and leave Lloyd. The next scene cuts to Harry walking down a barren road in Nebraska. In the background Lloyd comes zooming in on a dinky moped.
Harry Dunn: "Where did you find that?"
Lloyd Christmas: "Some kid back in town. Traded the van for it straight up. I can get 70 miles to the gallon on this hog."
Harry: "You know Lloyd. Just when I think you couldn't possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this. AND TOTALLY REDEEM YOURSELF!!!!! HAHA!"
Lloyd: "Does that mean you still wanna go to Aspen?"
Harry: "OH YEAH!"
This is the exact scene that played in my head when I heard the awesome news that Chris Henry -- yes THE Chris Henry -- was back as a Cincinnati Bungal. As if my outlook on the 2008 season wasn't already bad enough, now it's just plain laughable. But then again, there's only been one season in the last 20 that wasn't.
I really don't want to waste our server space at PigskinPodcast.com talking about this team. But it's like that car wreck you hate to see but from which can't turn away. I don't blame Chad Johnson for wanting out; apparently, he is the only smart one in this franchise. If I were Johnson, I'd get out now before I turn into Carl Pickens.
With the signing of Henry, every player in the locker room knows who's calling the shots: Coach Marvin Lewis just had his manhood ripped from him in front of a national audience. I just don't get or see what owner Mike Brown sees in Chris Henry. Is it his consistency? The only thing consistent with Henry is his look in mug shots.
Earlier this week on the podcast, Joel and Erik talked about the Henry situation. The Bengals are so desperate for a wide receiver that they're not only shopping running back Rudi Johnson, they've re-signed a player who almost had an entire NFL Conduct Policy named after him. Henry is probably thanking God that he was left off the hook by Pacman -- er, Adam -- Jones.
Mike Brown, this is why you run the Bungals. This is why you're a joke. You look like morons today and have been ever since you took over for your father.
"Hey! Let's sign a guy who can't play for four weeks. If we start off 0-4, I'm sure once we get Henry back, things will change."
What a freakin joke. Erik Bell's done his Browns preview; time for my Bengals snapshot: They'll be bad. They'll win six games if they're lucky. I honestly think they could finish up with the worst record in the AFC, and that's saying something. This team had promise three years ago; now they've given up their Bengal stripes for prison stripes. Pathetic.
Hey, when does Spring Training start?
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